My Dear Ethiopia

Since the day I saw you

I have loved you,

Your culture and rich tradition

I bowed to.

You have carried me with your love,

From day one to eleven, my beloved;

“Mother Ethiopia” I called you,

Home of Lucy, and animals like Kangaroo

Day by day you get more beautiful,

Just like your people and view.

I will see you soon,

That I promise you;

But till that day, I will say,

Mother Ethiopia, My Ethiopia I love you.


A Collection of Random Thoughts

                    “Always expect the worst out of things                     

                                 so that in                                   

           case the worst       

           occurs, you were

           ready for it.

           If the worst

            doesn’t occur,

           then you will be

           surprised and

            happy when the

           situation turned

out to be better than you thought it would.”



        something doesn’t go the

   way it was                    planned

   or how                        somebody wanted

  it to, someone they know will say, “get

over it, life isn’t fair”. But if that is said to

 everyone, shouldn’t        that mean that life

 isn’t fair to anyone?        If life isn’t fair to

 anyone, everybody        gets the some

unfairness.. Doesn’t        this mea that life is fair?.”


“If you are   supposed to           treat people

the way you    want to be        treated, then

why do people    harm each        other? Does

that mean        they want           to be harmed

back?  If you      ever want          to harm someone

in any way        shape or              form whether        

it is physically,      socially,        mentally, spiritually

, or emotionally,       think that   you are asking

for the same         thing to be  done to you.”


It’s All The Same

Guide the hand to a new fate,

And do not tell him of what you truly are,

Just smile at him, looking,

Away, from his face.


Listen to the voice that came from the hate,

And do not help him, only give him a taste,

Of who you desire, par,

Himself, neglected by you.


Guide his smile, to truly; who looks,

Yet, contrive, he is yours,

And he undermines by your fascination; benign,

To taste, the hand upon your face.


Simply untrue, undeserving, undesirable.

Away, from himself, neglect the hate,

Do not tell; the fate, so new; your heart

Won’t ever break.


Listen to the lies, you’re making up; lies.

Of given is the par, undermine who looks,

Telling not of a soul, to be under mine,

Is what of yours?


Guide to fascinate, to lay upon, undeserving of,

Your face, benign, you truly know,

Who you, are; not to be himself, he loves. He loves.

Simply, who he truly, undermines,

Who of what is your soul, not to understand,

Look now away, from yourself, smile,

Neglect the lies, not to love; not to hate.


Listen to the facade, voice, inside,

You won’t ever misapprehend,

Lies won’t ever break,

–Ever what is, undesirable won’t, how do you?


Guide to help him, do not,

Give to contrive to taste to know,

To understand your soul,

Suffice to desire the hate.


Simply, himself; as fate, smiles,

Fascinate the facade, obey,

Look, you’re mine, under love will never



Guide to what, he is not, true, you; to not stand,

Under; the hate, helps him; you

Do not, under what, stand upon the hand,

Fate lies at your, face.


Listen, you’re who you love, he loves,

The benign tastes the, heart; obeys the soul;

Contrive to suffice the untrue, neglect

–What once was the hand of fate.


Simply par, not mine, understand him,

Tell not the truth, of you are, who looks?

Fascinate the soul, he loves, but he hates. He hates, you.

Guide: to understand what it takes,

To stay awake, away, from the fate,

Breaking the heart; Undermining distaste, in himself,

Truly, doesn’t tell him you’re fascinated; the facade.


Simply: how he looks at your face,

Suffice the hate, desire the hate, you know

He will never neglect your lies, remained untrue,

Taking his hand, to the voice inside.


Listen: the soul gives into for what?

Contrive, you won’t ever misapprehend,

To par his smile, to you, and only you,

He loved you; you, to break his heart.


Look, it’s all the same.


I am Adventurous and Thoughtful

I wonder about what life holds.

I hear the sound of horses galloping.

I see the smiling sun shine on the river.

I want to be able to replay my dreams.

I am adventurous and thoughtful.

I pretend that life is a memory.

I feel that we are all created equal.

I touch God’s beautiful creatures.

I worry about the people across the ocean.

I cry about the things I haven’t done.

I am adventures and thoughtful.

I understand no one is perfect.

I say “live life to the fullest”.

I dream about life with no bullying.

I try to be the best I can be.

I hope to never regret what I have done.

I am adventures and thoughtful.  



The Delicate Dancing Shoes

As I wait backstage my heart pounds in fear.

If I mess up, will I loose my job?

Will I lose my pride?

Will I lose every ounce of confidence left in my body?

“Dont mess up”, I try to tell myself.

It’s almost my cue.

The numbers 5, 6, 7, and 8 rolling through my brain.

I hear the last drumbeat and my entrance begins.

On top of my box I go and bourree to my spot.

The millions of eyes staring right at me.

This is the moment I have been waiting for all my life.

Why live in fear?

When you can live your life doing what you love.

~Nicole Alexakos

Where I’m From

I am from the hourglass, from time

I am from the earth, Mysterious; foreign

I am from the thorn, the weed of the ground

I am from the chaos, the competition of life

From Mary to Joseph from God

I am from the liars, the cheaters

I’m from sayings, “life doesn’t owe you anything”

I’m from a belief to “trust no one”

I am from behind the curtain in the temple

From the corner of the sanctuary

I am from darkness, from the bitterness

From dates and prunes

I’m from the alcoholics and the drug addicts, the swindlers

I’m from the forgotten memory of a time of serenity

I’m from hatred, from the thoughts of suicide that burn in the mind

I’m from the haunted house, I am the thoughts of the ghosts

I’m from the father that left, the mother that abused

I am from the arguments and the lies

I am a dark stormy sea

Desperately trying to drown her crew

I am from the rain, the quells

I am from all things people avoid

But I am still me.


This is Me

People see me as Etsub,

A girl like a flower that bloom.

Knows what she wants and go out to get it;

These opinions became a habit.

I tell myself every day, you are perfect;

All these lies I didn’t see the effect.

No one would believe,

If I told them the real me…


I am a girl that is lost trying to find her way around,

Still searching for a common ground.

When I say I got it just disappears,

One after another all these years.

They tell me Etsub you are amazing;

I tell them that it is not surprising.

I have experienced all facets of life,

I can possibly think of.

I try to fly freely like a dove,

Cause all this thing I need to get rid of,

But always fall short,

Guilt, sorrow, anger, sadness,

I try to leave all in his presence…

~Estub Tolossa


Love is not isolation from society because “that’s your person.”

Love is not expecting favors.

Love is not giving your all to get nothing in return.

Love is not receiving someone’s all and giving nothing in return.

Love is not endless jealousy and insecurity.

Love is not constant happiness followed by no pain.

Love is not an “I love you” text after disrespect

Love is knowing.

Love is respecting.

Love is appreciating.

Love is silence.

Love is trust.

Love is not knowing what to expect.

Love is a smile at the thought.


From a Storm Grew a Rose

Trees and flowers dancing in the wind, leaves blown away

Sun hidden behind clouds and shining within

What a lovely day

Bees buzzing, birds chirping, singing their enchanting song

Listening to the sound of nature, I can do it all day long


Rain trickling down the window and thunder filling the air

Behind dark cloud I didn’t know  

The sun still shone back there

As lightening strikes I stand steadfast and start to feel bliss

I remember that after this storm something will grow from this


Through each day comes different feelings

They all work together to make

The flowers that grow, the insects below, the fruit that we take

So even though the storm is raging and you just want it to go

The sun nourishes, the storm waters so a seedling to blossom and grow


corrupted conscience.

head throbs
heart pounds
as your voice chases me around
running me out of my own body
telling me i’m not quite good enough
if i would only wear more makeup and brush my hair once in awhile

i could be pretty
but i could use some work
my waist slims but so does my confidence
i beg myself to stop giving in to your voice
but it chases me into the darkness
i’ve run so far away from my body now that i can’t find a way back in
your voice is home now and i wait for your approval
i wait to be good enough
i wait for my head to stop throbbing
i wait for my heart to stop beating


Parte del Alma Mía

Madre, parte del alma mía

La amiga intimísima

La maestra más sabia

Me has enseñado todo lo que yo conozco.


Eres una torre alta y fuerte

Descansas en un fundamento sólido

Tu paciencia y fe son faros

Luces que me advierten.


Abuela, parte del alma mía

La artista más diestra

La cocinera más fantástica

Tu cultura me crió.


Eres un libro de cuentos

Tus talentos sobrepasan que tú comprendes

Cada día me sorprendes

Con la fuente de experiencias que tú tienes.


Queridas mujeres, partes del alma mía

Me hicieron quien yo soy hoy en día

Cuando ambas hayan pasado

Ustedes estarán en mi alma todavía.



it’s seeping

into my pores

and i hate the way

people stick to my


i almost compared

the hair i pulled out

in the shower,

to what my mother

found on her pillow,

but she lost more of

herself than i have

i’m picking at my nails,

it’s the only way

i’ll forget about all the

people that forgot

to stay,

or i’ll dream about

telling him that

fire extinguishers

won’t burn down the

world and that he wakes

up the next morning,

but instead only

the people he left do

and i keep on trying

to drown my memories

of ghosts that still


its seeping

into my pores

and my hair is

tangled with broken


my teeth are

falling out

in time with

the songs i use

to fill the space

silence leaves

smoke fills my lungs

and i still haven’t learned

how not to cough up

pieces of the past

that get stuck in

the drain i tried

to clean with vodka,

that night he tried

to put out flames,

and be the hero,

when he was the only one


This Is For Me

This is for me
This is for the breaths I have yet to take
for the memories I have yet to unfold
for the dreams I have yet to discover
This is for the struggles I faced In the past
to which I will part ways with comradeship
for they gave bruises to my knees and make me realize
that falling down does not mean it’s the end
This is for my passions and strengths
the constellations in my eyes
the flowers beneath my skin
and the moon in my heart
This is for me
This is for who I was
This is for who I can be
This is for who I’ve become
This is for who I want to be
not who you want me to be

Untitled /2

My mind is traveling a thousand miles an hour

In the corner the rest of my body just sits and scour

I don’t think twice I think once and repeat it a million times

My thoughts have gone more sour than a billion limes

Dodging thoughts like my mind’s a mine field

My brain is eating up my confidence like a healthy meal

Hope I can relieve some of this with rhymes

I just keep fighting myself internally

Gotta keep on going… continue this journey

Feeling like my brain’s a stranger and I’m a mime

I don’t even know who I am anymore

As far as I know my old self went straight out the door

Just gotta keep telling everyone I’m doing fine

I gotta lie… gotta lie my way through life

Gotta keep my mind from winning this strife


Retirement from Pennsylvania

One day

I’ll be far away

This place is not where I want to be

This place is holding me back, can’t you see

The people

The places

The opportunities

Not what I want

Not what I need

Any other place is a better lead

I’m the one who needs happiness

And I can’t find it here

So many people are near

They don’t help

It’s this place

I need my own space

It is not here 

— Amy Haberstroh 

You Want To Be Like Me?

Although I’m not sure who would want to be,

Such a reserved and masked actress like me,

I’ll list some tips to help you change,

If that is what you wish.

Use smiles and laughs to hide your ways,

Watch an anime marathon that lasts for days.

Just don’t forget the juice and snacks,

The decision will haunt you endlessly.

Press some keys, pull some strings,

Tune your voice, sing some things,

Write a song for a sister’s birthday,

And don’t present it early.

Observe all, find a purpose,

Prove, to yourself, that you’re not worthless.

Just for the words, read a poem,

And keep its meaning in mind.

Find a girl, tell her you love her,

Keep, in your wallet, her school picture.

Treat her like she is the only one,

Because, after all, she is.

Make a promise and don’t break it,

Build up your story bit by bit.

If you really want to be like me,

Do yourself a favor…

And Be You. 

— Christopher 

The Difference Between You and I

They asked what would I be if I could be anything so I said good enough but you said happy and that’s the difference between you and I because all I want is to please others and feel like I’m worth your time but you just want that false state of euphoria where you don’t feel sad and that’s why you turned to drugs and I turned to a blade because I punish myself while you punish the world but no amount of drugs or razors will change us.

Everywhere and Nowhere

People always ask where you are from.

I don’t see the point in this,

Not even a little bitty bit.

Why ask where a person comes from when that’s not where they are?

Yes, it made them who they are,

But it shouldn’t matter whether they come from somewhere amazing,

or somewhere terrible.

The past can not be changed

And who would want it to?

The past is what made who we are.

Who are we to decide what it should have been like.

Whether it was nice, Continue reading

Miserably Not

I want to jump but

My demons keep holding me up and

I think I want to die except

I know it’s only a lie


They feed on your misery

Kind of how you feed on mine

And I know you think it’s fine

But all you crave is victory

Where does it say that this is okay

Using another human for your amusement


I don’t know how to feel

I know it seems like I’m okay

But I just can’t seem to find my way

I used to think you were the perfect person

But now I see you’re just a curse and

You left me with nothing but

Dread and the wish not to exist so

Congratulations on your first conquest

It was a success over all the rest


Mess with an angel

And you’ll make ‘em a devil

Careful what you play with

Not everyone is as dishonestly stable


I’m Me

I’m from big cornfields and big open spaces.

I’m from small towns in southern Lancaster.

    I’m from long trips to the beach in the summer.

   I’m from fresh cookies baked on a hot summer day.

     I’m from a dear old man that influenced my life.

   I’m from two older siblings, loving and caring.

    I’m from being a door and a window.

   I’m from yelling and fun on long summer nights.

   I’m from country tunes being sung all day long.

   I’m from a caring home, never being left behind.

-Dorathy Kammerer